


Something Red

by cinder1013



Category: Glee
Genre: Episode Related, M/M, Spoilers, ep 5x08, well klaine and kurt hummel implied
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-07
Updated: 2013-12-07
Packaged: 2018-01-03 21:42:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1073374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinder1013/pseuds/cinder1013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Santana's speech as Kurt's co-maid of honor at his wedding with Blaine</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something Red

So, all my peeps, I’ve been told I have to give a speech and I take that almost seriously. To lady Hummel and his male bride, I offer ... oh fuck it! I’ve known these two since Blaine was questioning his sexuality and kissing Berry. Short lived, I know, but Blaine is a six pack away from straight, which just amuses the fuck out of me. 

I’ve known Hummel since he was a pretender who made us all think he was both lacking in talent and safe ... better not said about that, but if you want to know, Kurt, I hold a grudge. 

Anywho, to you two cats, who mate when I really don’t want to hear it. Kurt, better Blaine than role playing with bad Santa. And Blaine ... yeah. Look, you lucked out and if you don’t remember it, I will beat you with a shovel. But I’ve told you that before. 

Yeah, I remember bad Santa, hog tying Kurt to the bed. Blaine, you ever tried that? Because his thighs are totally awesome and I recommend it. Also fucking him in the ass, but I've ... I mean, you’ve done that too. 

So, I cherish the both of you and love you and I will never have sex with either of you again unless you get me drunk enough. Where’s the bar?


End file.
